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Live to hope

Dear Friend, I can see that you have lost hope. You have not been yourself lately. I see your tears, and I noticed that you no longer smile. I wanted to tell you that you’re not alone. Two years ago, when my brokenness and despair climbed to unimaginable heights I decided to end

Renewed Hope

Easter is my favourite time of year. When I was growing up, we followed certain traditions. My family turned the house upside down and cleaned everything under the watchful eyes of my Ma, who instructed which new curtains should go up. New bed sheets, wares, vinyls on the kitchen floor... The entire

Waiting to Fly

I was listening to Lana Del Rey’s I Can Fly, and it elicited something in me. She sings ‘You had me caged up like a bird in the summer....I was waiting to fly...’ I imagined the ‘You’ in her song as the depression and complex PTSD stifling me, tying my wings

The Will to …

In early December I will self publish my first novel.  I'm still quite busy preparing for that, though it's a pretty small affair. I've been thinking about it. The whole thing. First, I didn't think it would actually happen with all the health and life challenges. I mean, I was writing things and then

Your life is worth more than you know

As always I am thinking about purpose. Alot of things about it. I don't know if the same is true for anyone else who has walked in my shoes, but everytime I have seriously considered suicide or acted towards it, I always wondered what the world would be like without me.

We Never Walk Alone

It’s been some of those weeks when, while encouraging people to hope, I’ve been simultaneously trying to convince myself. You know what I’m saying? When my Mama Claire gives the ‘we cannot give up’ talk, without fail she will say ‘we live in hope.’ And we do. At least, I try my best.

Living for others

     Only a life lived for others is worth living – Albert Einstein   In our own struggles we can sometimes forget others. It’s a human thing. But to remember others while we are in the midst of storms, makes life worth living. Sometimes we might think we have nothing to give, but that’s not

Just hope…

  Sometimes we're not always sure why we bother to hope against the darkness. We cannot see ahead as we feel our hands about, walking aimlessly in the pitch black, yet seeking. It is called blind faith. Believing in the absence of proof. This is faith. I am in short supply of optimism, but faith and

Ramblings on a fibromyalgia flare

I may need a walking stick, again. I am not happy about this but some days the pain in my feet is unbearable. Whenever I get caught off guard by the fiery stabs striking my feet I risk falling over. Living with an invisible illness is hard as it is. My visually