I’ve been in a funk.
Some of my lovely connections on social media have pointed out my absence. It wasn’t planned.
It’s just been a rough year, replete with multiple losses, grief and pain. The same old battles with chronic illness, fibromyalgia, depression, trauma, systemic injustice, and new ones.
I wake thankful everyday for all I have, but I find myself unable to keep hold of any joy for too long.
Everyday I remember my friend Jens who so badly wanted to live, and had no choice but to say goodbye to us, and I still catch glimpses of Liz while I’m out, then I remember she is not here. Life was too much for her to bear so she departed. And my uncle Des, who died suddenly at the young age of 57. That was all this year alone. Time hasn’t eased the grief of losses from previous years.
I’m angry and sad about a lot. I mourn for those suffering in the throes of other people’s wars. And I do not feel within myself to celebrate.
I know I am not alone in any of this. And this is just a short note to acknowledge that everyone who is feeling the same sense of hopelessness, and helplessness, whilst trying to plod on and do whatever they can to make things a little better for ourselves and others.
It is all very exhausting. So I am taking time to rest, recoup and hopefully come back with a little more fire in my belly to go forward again. You should too.
This is for the ones who feel lost, alone, unhappy, afraid, confused, and uncertain.
Sending you love and gentle hugs. Happy Christmas and may 2024 be brighter for all of us. Xxx
Slider photo by Anshu A
Photo by Michael Fenton