I’ve been completely trapped by pain in the last three days.
I cannot lie, with the right medication I had managed to push through the barriers in an attempt to live (ie go to work, have friends, relationships and fulfil my dreams) albeit at a much slower pace than a healthier person but still. Still.
Then the F monster attacked with full force, and I had to leave work early on the brink of fainting with heavy spinning head and fiery jabs of pain all over my body. By nightfall, a titanic migraine moved into the front of my head and I could barely sit up.
The tummy aches and cramps (IBS which many of us fibromites suffer from) have been unbearable. I went for the hot beanie bag on the tummy and a cold washcloth on the forehead as I also started feeling feverish.
When I tried to go collect my meds later that day I had to rush back home, the dizziness is so consuming, it’s like a whirlwind that picks you up making it impossible to walk in a straight line.
I felt drunk.
It all persisted with a vengeance for three full days. I woke in between having the chills, drenched in cold sweat, then feeling feverish and cold again.
Call for help
I’d rung the emergency GP line. They advised me to see my in the morning asap. My friends insisted too. I rang the GP to see if a home visit was possible given that I didn’t feel confident that I could walk in my state.
I encountered a bigger monster who doubted the severity of my symptoms. The GP insisted that I should be able to walk to the surgery despite my symptoms. He said he symptoms were very ‘normal’ and I could walk that distance; there was nothing else he could do for me. I asked him about the fever and all. He doubted that I had one. I told him he was doubting the severity of my symptoms and if anything happened to me he would be liable. He told me to ring back in the evening and he would decide if I could get a home visit. I was fuming mad.
In the evening, I fell asleep in my drunken exhaustion and my flatmate awoke me to say I had a guest. A doctor.
He came out of compulsion, and after examining me said ‘as I said before there is nothing we can do to help, just keep taking the painkillers.’
Oh joy. At least I know there’s nothing else wrong? Hopefully. Perhaps this is just what a a a bad fibro flare looks like? Riding it out in hope.
Be good. Gentle hugs 🙂